Members Section Collaborative Divorce Texas

blankHeader

  • Donate
  • For Professionals
    • Membership Advantages
    • Events/Training
    • Become a Member
    • For Students
    • Volunteer at CDT
    • Advertise with Us
  • Contact Us
  • Login
  • What is Collaborative Divorce?
    • What is Collaborative Divorce
    • Why Use a CDTexas Member?
    • About Us
    • Master and Credentialed Collaborative Divorce Professionals
    • The Gay G. Cox Award for Excellence in Collaborative Law
      • Testimonials
  • FAQs
  • Blog
    • General Articles
  • Find A Professional
    • How Do I Choose a Collaborative Professional?
    • Attorneys
    • Financial Professionals
    • Mental Health Professionals
    • See All
  • Home
  • Find a Collaborative Professional
  • What is a Collaborative Divorce?
    • What is Collaborative Divorce?
    • Frequently Asked Questions
    • About CDTexas
    • Master and Credentialed Collaborative Divorce Professionals
    • The Gay G. Cox Award for Excellence in Collaborative Law
  • Blog
    • General Articles
  • For Collaborative Professionals
    • Membership Benefits
    • Events/Training
    • Become a Member
    • For Students
    • Advertise with Us
    • Volunteer at CDT
    • Login
  • Donate
  • Contact Us

Donate

  • Credentialing
  • Members Blog
You are here: Home / Members Blog / Practice Tip – Don’t Forget to Listen

Practice Tip – Don’t Forget to Listen

December 15, 2022 By Julie Quaid

What does it mean to really listen and why is it important in a collaborative case? Really listening requires paying attention to the words spoken, to hear the spoken words with thoughtful attention. Too often, even in collaboratives cases, we are listening to respond instead of to understand. We feel a need to respond immediately with a solution instead of through thoughtful, curious questions and taking the time to hear the client’s interests behind the strict words spoken. We are focusing on our own internal soliloquy which can dilute or even obliterate important messages that others are trying to send, whether it be the clients or other members of the collaborative team. These messages will not be heard or understood if they are not given our full, undivided attention, we will not be able to meet the clients (or the team) where they are and to respond in an empathetic way.

Most of us felt connected to the collaborative process from the very first moment we learned what it was all about, and we sincerely try to help clients transition through the divorce process in a way that will result in better, more respectful communication between them after divorce. 

While we acknowledge at times that the healing may not begin until the divorce is finalized, we secretly want the process itself to begin to heal their wounds and because of that, we may tend to gloss over their emotions if they make us feel uncomfortable. Remember that as wonderful as the collaborative process is, the clients are still traversing a divorce and it is not easy, the facts are unique to them even though we may have heard the scenario a million times. Most of them have not experienced the atrocities of litigation. They have nothing to compare this experience to and need to be able to express their emotions no matter how raw. Pay attention to the words themselves but also to the emotions and feelings behind the words. Hold space for your client and his/her spouse. Take the initiative to be empathetic to their situation or circumstance. Allow them the grace to do what they need to begin healing even if it means expressing emotions that make us uncomfortable, such as anger or pain. Offer them the opportunity to be fully heard and acknowledge their emotion. Be kind. Your clients will be better for it and so will you.

About Julie Quaid

Julie is the current President of CDT and is a collaborative family lawyer in Dallas, Texas.

Filed Under: Members Blog, xyz-Featured Author

Search for a Professional

Search by:

County

Add Name of County

City

Add Name of City

Last Name

Search By Last Name

Bilingual Professionals

Featured Video

  • Collaborative Divorce Testimonial
  • Collaborative Divorce
  • Child of Divorce

Why Collaborative?

  • Becky Davenport
  • Jody Johnson
  • James Urmin
  • Dr. Honey Sheff
  • Steve Walker
  • Carla Calabrese
  • Dawn Budner
  • Jennifer Leister
  • Camille Scroggins
  • Robert Matlock
  • Natalie Gregg
  • Mickey Gayler
  • Deborah Lyons
  • Carlos Salinas
  • Linda Solomon
  • Richard Soat
  • Lisa Rothfus
  • Jeffrey Shore
  • Barbara Cole
  • David Brunson
  • Syd
  • Susan Z.
  • Cristi Trusler
  • Camille Milner
  • Linda Threats
  • Sarah Keathley
  • MaryAnn Kildebeck
  • David Bouschor
  • Lisa Marquis
  • Harry Munsinger
  • Vicki James
  • Robin Watts
  • Katie Berry
  • Jack Emmott
  • Jennifer Broussard
  • Patricia Havard
  • Paula Locke Smyth
  • Norma Trusch
  • Laura Schlenker
  • Brett Christiansen
  • Tim Whitten
  • Melinda Eitzen
  • Julian Schwartz
  • MaryAnne Knolle
  • Chad Olsen
  • Chris Farish
  • Charles Quaid
  • Anne Shuttee
  • Barbara Runge
  • Rhonda Cleaves
  • Jamie Patterson
  • Catherine Baron
  • Kristen Algert
  • Sandra Roland
  • Rhonda Cleaves 2
  • Gratia Schoemakers

Membership Login



signup now | forgot password?

The Collaborative Law Institute of Texas

d/b/a
Collaborative Divorce Texas

Proud Members of IACP

1400 Preston Road
Suite 400
Plano, TX 75093
(972) 386-0158

Please note: Our office will be closed on

Holiday closures:
Limited: Nov. 23rd & 24th
Closed: Nov. 25th , 26th and 27th

Christmas:
Closed from December 24-December 30, 2022.
Offices open on January 2nd, 2023.

Website Terms of Usage

Contact Our Webmaster

Follow Us

  • Facebook
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • Vimeo
  • YouTube

Search Our Website

Find A Professional

  • Find a Collaborative Professional
  • Attorneys
  • Financial Professionals
  • Mental Health Professionals
  • See All

…CMT…

EnglishFrançaisDeutschItalianoPortuguêsEspañol

Copyright © 2023 · Collaborative Divorce Texas · All Rights Reserved

· · ·

Web Design and Maintenance by The Crouch Group